The Universe, Now In High Definition

Breaking News: Methacton's Planetarium equipment is 41 years old.

Yeah, I kinda said the same thing, "damn, that's old". A lot has changed in 41 years, but I guess the stars don't change that much.

Now the Methacton School Board, at the most recent work session meeting, is considering spending $300,000 to "lease" the equipment (it's kind of complicated; kinda like how Aaron's or Rent-a-Center works, sans Hulk Hogan). And I am completely on board with it. Every pun intended.

The current projector--I shall call her Ol' Cosmic from here on out--looks like some sort of space laser cannon out of a sci-fi movie released in the early 2000's that someone took an auger and went ape sh*t on the domey tip thingy. The augered dome spun around, and Ol' Cosmic spun at her base, giving us the chance to see the night sky at any time from any part of the world. I liked going to the planetarium; it meant getting away from the half-lit basement we called Arcola half the time, and was at least five times more interesting than whatever the hell we learned in math, science, English, whatever.

However, like many women, Ol' Cosmic is a woman who knows what she wants, and how she wants it. What I mean is, only one person really knows how to work the planetarium--Mr. Ted Williams--and he is the only one able to really teach there. Don't get me wrong; Mr. Williams knows his outer space, but to many students, he was abrasive at best as a teacher.

This new digital system will be complex enough to project as much outer space as we want, but simple enough that you can train a monkey teacher to use it after awhile. That's a key point, because this planetarium projector doesn't just have the capability to project space.

At the work session meeting, the soon-to-be-gone Director of Curriculum went ad nauseum on what the potential uses of this plantarium could be: in depth molecular models for science, complete Earth mapping and the ability to go explore the darkest reaches of our planet in geography, the ability to project art projects for an art show, the visual interpretation of The Planets by Gustav Holt--wait, we can do that now. Well, I bet it can be done better. And all of those curriculum based uses for the new planetarium were thrown out there only guessing at what can be done with it, saying how those are the apps they have for the system now. On top of which, there is an app now that allows the planetarium to travel out of the dome and be seen on that incredible use of taxpayer's money we call the iPad lab in Arcola. Finally, a half-decent use for a set of overpriced tablets!

If I had a say (or in this case, the say), I would have made $300,000 magically appear in my hand that night, and I would have thrown it at whoever I have to throw it to. It's times like these that I don't mind a capital gains project--the planetarium isn't a turf field, it's educational. My generation doesn't have the Apollo missions; going to the moon has been canceled due to funding. But I love space. This would be a great way to re-energize this generations interest in all things outside of Earth.

And if it's anything like Ol' Cosmic, it may last 41 years.